OutSpoken

          Let me borrow Ge’s former blogname for the title of this blog (even without her approval-hehehe… I know she won’t mind and if she does, I don’t mind - JOKE!).  When I read her blog “The Essence of a woman is…” I fell into deep introspection.  I wonder how my boys would answer if somebody would ask them who are the most influential persons in their lives and why.  It’s quite scary to think that they would say it’s us their parents.  It’s even scarier to think how they would elaborate on their answer.

          I really wonder what my sons would say about us.  I admit I am not a perfect mother.  In fact, I often hear my sons complain about my ‘nagging’ or shall I call it preaching?.  There was a time when my 4-year old even warned me to shut up or he would leave the house.  There was this time when I was telling him that it is bad to butt in when adults are talking, and he just rolled his eyes and covered his both ears, like saying ‘there you go again, shut up, mom!’.  One time, he asked me if he could play outside and before I could even say anything, he began singing “Hayaan mong maglaro ang bata sa araw…”  While Abby, my 3 year-old seconded, “I got stinky, messy, but you see… I learned,” mimicking a TV commercial. How could I say no in such instances?  Ofcourse, I gave in. 

          I am currently struggling as a parent in terms of how to keep my children on the right path while our social environment is not an ideal place to raise responsible, obedient and God-fearing children.  This adds up to the challenge.

          Even my parenting skills are lacking and I know that the way I discipline my children is a big factor on how their behavior and attitude would develop.  Because my kids are smart, I often wrongly assumed that they were mature enough to know what is right and wrong, and when something went wrong, I got easily disappointed and punished them immediately for their wrongdoings only to realize later that I should have had guided them on the right direction - my mistake! 

          Some relatives and neighbors would jokingly tell me… “ipaghanda mo na ng pangpiyansa si Ully.”  I would just respond with a smile but whenever I hear comments like this, my heart pounds so fast and fear fills my mind.  What if my sons get along with an unsavory group of peers when they grow up?  Would I let my kids to stay late at night like most children do in our neighborhood?  How do I train my kids to establish good habits so that they will be armed with good values and attitudes which they may use to refuse bad influences later in life?

          Now, I don’t only have one kid to train but three little boys to raise and I am a freshman when it comes to parenting and disciplining kids.  I know it’s going to be a life time of extremely hardwork to become a diligent parent.  But I need to always remember that I have to ensure that my children will grow up to be productive individuals by guiding them into the right direction.  Meanwhile, my husband and I will need  to learn how to deal with them more tactfully and to make our home a place where they can be KIDS… where they are accepted, loved and valued regardless of what they do or say.  Another difficult challenges for us…